Summer camp is one of the best experiences you can give your child. Not only will he or she make wonderful friends and try new activities, but your child will also learn life skills such as teamwork, leadership, and confidence that will help your child grow up to be a successful adult. Below are some DO’s and DON’Ts for parents to help ensure their child has the most positive summer camp experience possible.
DO involve your child in the camp process: When searching for a summer camp, the more involved your child is in decisions about camp, the more comfortable your child will feel about going to camp.
DON’T automatically assume the camp you went to is right for your child: If you had a great experience, it’s only natural to want that for your child. But of course your child is not you. Make sure your camp has a program that is of interest to your child and will be the right fit. Be honest with yourself. If it isn’t a good fit, do your research to find the right camp for your child.
DO get to know the camp director: Ask about the camp’s philosophy and program, and make sure they match your family’s own values.
DON’T try to impress camp directors with how you know their job better than they do: As much as you want to feel comfortable with a camp director, the camp director wants to feel like you’re a parent who will be a good and reasonable partner.
DO tour the camp when possible: Touring a camp the summer before can help families get a real feel for the camp before registering. It also gives parents a chance to ask key questions while in the camp environment. “All camp directors want prospective families to visit and meet with them in person. When possible, parents should take the time to visit the camp and meet with the directors to learn about the camp,” says Jim Libman, owner and director of Camp Hillard, a day camp in Scarsdale, NY. “Most of the time, after parents visit and meet with the camp directors, all their questions are answered and they know whether or not the camp is a good fit for their child.”
DON’T tour the camp and compare it unfavorably to another camp during the tour: Keep in mind that each camp is different, and what might not be the right camp for your child might be the perfect fit for another. The more you think about the camp after the tour, you may decide you liked it more than you originally thought.
DO practice separation throughout the year: Have your child sleep over at friends’ and relatives’ houses before you decide to send your child to sleepaway camp. Being away from home can help simulate the camp experience.
DON’T practice separation against their will: This isn’t meant to be tortuous. Rather, it’s about taking steps in the right direction when kids are ready and willing to take it on, even if they’re a bit nervous about it.
DO share positive camp messages: It’s important for parents to share positive messages about summer camp. It is common for a child to have some apprehension as the first day of camp approaches—encourage your child to talk about these feelings. “Sitting down and watching the camp’s video as a family is a great way to get the kids psyched for camp,” Libman says. “Viewing the website and reading the pre-camp newsletters are also other ways to get them excited.”
DON’T play Alan Sherman’s “Hello Muddah, Hello Fadduh (A Letter from Camp)”: The classic camp parody song describing a miserable camper is still a riot, but perhaps better appreciated after your child has had a year or two of camp behind them.
DO pack for camp with your child: If your child is going to sleepaway camp, discuss what items will be needed for camp and pack together. Your child will feel more secure if they know what they are bringing to camp, and you can use the time packing together to talk with your child about how much fun camp is going to be. Make sure to look at the camp packing list and respect the items the camp asks you to leave at home.
DON’T pack stuff that is banned: Make sure to look at the camp packing list and respect the items the camp asks you to leave at home, such as cell phones and iPads. Not only is it wrong to violate the camp code, but it’s doubly wrong to make your child complicit.
DO discuss possible homesickness: “Parents and campers should discuss what they should do if they miss home,” says Cole Kelly, director of Camp Weequahic, a co-ed sleepaway camp in Lakewood, PA. “It’s a natural part of being away. Building a strategy at home that includes knowing missing home is normal, talking with a counselor, and writing a letter saying: ‘I miss home and these are the three things I like about camp’ are useful. The ‘and’ is important!”
DON’T make pick-up deals: While discussing camp, don’t make plans to pick your child up from camp if he doesn’t like it. Making a pick-up deal sends your child the message that you don’t believe he will be successful at camp. Before camp begins, let your child know you are confident in his or her ability to have a wonderful summer camp experience.
DO remember you’ve taught them well: Feel confident that you have taught your child well. and that everything you instilled in him or her will stay intact while at camp. Separation from you will give your child confidence and the ability to problem solve without your help.
DON’T focus too much on correspondence from camp in the first few days of camp: If you receive a discouraging phone call or a letter from your child, remember that, like any new experience, adjusting to camp may take a few days and that severe homesickness is rare. Encourage your camper to enjoy all the exciting camp activities and remind him or her of all the wonderful aspects of camp.
DO send letters from home: Remember to send your child letters while at camp. One-way emails are great, but handwritten letters with a parents’ handwriting feel very personal to a child. Acknowledge you miss your child, but in a positive way such as: “I miss you, but I know you are having the best time at camp.”
DON’T discuss all the things your child is missing: Avoid telling your child about all they are missing at home when you speak with them on the phone or write a letter. This can make a child feel homesick.
DO check your camp’s package policy: Before sending a package to camp, check your camp’s package policy as each camp has its own. Some allow for packages, others don’t.
DON’T try to sneak in food, candy or gum: “The staff will just have to take it away, which puts them in the hard position of saying the parents broke the rules,” Kelly says. “If a camp asks you not to pack or send edible items, they have specific reasons for the requirement.”
DO read your camp’s policies on bringing food to camp visiting day: Some camps have campers with severe food allergies and don’t allow outside food on camp grounds. Many camps also don’t allow children to keep food past the evening of visiting day.
DON’T bring banned items to camp on visiting day: These items can include cell phones, iPads, gaming systems, and cameras that record video. By bringing these items to your child at camp, you are teaching your child that rules don’t apply to them.
DO limit calls to camp office: While your child is at camp, try to abstain from calling the camp director with every thought or worry you may have about your child. When your child is at camp, allow him or her to solve their own problems or ask a counselor for help. “Have confidence in the camp director,” Libman adds.
DON’T stalk the online photos posted: While it’s great to see your child in the pictures the camp posts, try not to analyze what your child is feeling. If your child isn’t smiling, it doesn’t mean he or she isn’t happy. Your child could just be engaged in whatever activity is taking place at the time.
DO thank your child’s counselors at the end of the session: Being a counselor is a labor of love, but it’s also job and taking care of children 24/7 is not always joy ride, needless to say. So when the time comes, make an extra effort to thank the counselors. “If you are happy with the camp experience, send a thank-you letter or email to your child’s bunk counselors through the camp director,” Kelly says. “Counselors put in a great deal of effort and a kind note from a parent is greatly appreciated.”
DON’T assume the camp allows tipping: “Many camps have different stances on the subject. Make sure you check first with the camp directors,” Kelly adds.