My 18-year-old son, Luke, is leaving to spend his first semester of college in Australia. To get him ready there was paperwork, packing and last minute laundry. We also made sure we saw extended family, grandparents and had some immediate-family time, which included Luke, my husband, Neil, our 15 year-old daughter, Meg, and me. Luke and I wanted mother-son time as well. I had thought we might take a long walk or go for lunch, but Luke wanted to go rowing in Central Park.
I’ve lived here all my life, and although I’ve always to, I had never gone boating in Central Park. In fact, when I was first dating Neil, he asked me one afternoon what I wanted to do and I suggested a romantic rowboat date. His facial expression made it clear that rowing me around the lake by Bethesda Fountain was not his idea of a good time. He’s lucky I kept going out with him.
Even though Luke and I had a great time, with pictures on Facebook and Instagram to prove it, I wondered why we waited until he was leaving to do a fun New York City activity. After sharing with other mothers the story of our “afternoon at sea,” I realized that the Merkls aren’t the only family who doesn’t consistently take full advantage of what NYC has to offer. Why is it that we often put off enjoying what other people save their vacation money to do and travel miles to experience, until we have our own visitors or feel like it’s a sort of last chance situation?
Although I often visit The Met, Whitney and Guggenheim, the only time I’ve ever ventured up to the Museum of the City of New York was when Luke or Meg had a class trip there.
I pass the Empire State Building on the way to Meg’s school and usually don’t even notice it.
I’d wanted to reside in Manhattan since I was in the fourth grade and living in the Bronx, and got my first apartment here when I was twenty-five. You’d think in the thirty years that I’ve been here, I would constantly make the most of being in the city that I’ve always loved. Instead, I am often caught up in my own routine.
I’ve been known to take it personally when something in this ever-changing city takes even the smallest turn in a new direction, such as The Met doing away with its colored admittance buttons for paper ones that stick to your clothing. When I read the news, I wanted to cry. In fact, I could probably buy some of the museum’s works of art if I had a dollar for every time I passed up a restaurant, store or attraction with a hand wave and the quip, “Too touristy.”
It took spending those last few weeks in New York City with Luke to realize that touring this city isn’t so bad. It fact, it’s fun. Visitors are the ones with guidebooks and Internet searches advising on where the “must-see” or “must-do” things are in NYC. Why are we letting them have all the fun?
Lorraine Duffy Merkl is a freelance writer in NYC and author of the novel, FAT CHICK, and the upcoming BACK TO WORK SHE GOES. Learn more about her writing at lorraineduffymerkl.com.
