Money is tight this holiday season, and I’m afraid my children are going to be disappointed when they don’t get everything they have asked for. What’s the best way to deal with this?
It’s an understatement to say that the holidays can be stressful instead of joyful. Children are not immune to that stress, particularly when it comes to their holiday wishes, and the disappointment they may experience over not having those wishes fulfilled.
The best way to handle the situation is to take the disappointment that children may experience when they don’t get everything they want and gently use it to teach an important lesson. The message children can learn from their disappointment is that the value that we place on material goods often overshadows what the holidays are really about: family, friends, and feasts!
Children may focus on what they did not get as opposed to the toys and gifts they did receive. (This can be particularly true when it comes to the latest toy on the market, which turns out to be either unavailable come December, or far too expensive.)
However, if they realize that their greatest wish is something beyond a specific toy or present, then they will be disappointment-proof. Parents have to set a good example, which means getting out of a materialistic mindset themselves.
In order to teach a child that the holidays have importance outside of gifts, parents should focus on the value of relationships with loved ones. Children learn a lot from interacting with a network of supportive family and friends. Emphasize that this is what the holidays are truly about.
Creating family traditions is a way to take the focus away from purchased material goods. Parents can spend time with their children cooking, playing an annual holiday game, or making homemade presents together. Some ideas for low-cost, enjoyable family activities outside of the house can include ice-skating with cousins, drinking hot cocoa from thermoses with friends in the park, or making snow angels.
Other ways to make the holidays meaningful might be volunteering your family’s time at a soup kitchen, an animal shelter, or at other community organizations. This demonstrates that giving comes in many forms, and donating your time and care for the benefit of others may be more rewarding than a material item.
Parents can demonstrate to their children that the holidays are a joyous time filled with love and the opportunity to show affection through various kinds of “gifts.” Along with the wrapped presents, engaging in seasonal activities with family members and good friends, volunteering, and creating family traditions can make the holiday season a fulfilling time for everyone.
